‘Wind farms cure cancer, save kittens, create world peace’ says new wind industry report | James Delingpole

August 31, 2012

Saved: and all thanks to wind farms!

Wind energy is great says a new report commissioned by the Labour think tank Institute For Public Policy Research.

Among the report’s findings are that large scale industrial wind farms can:

• Boost GDP growth by up to 3,000 per cent

• Cure all known forms of cancer

• Rescue drowning kittens from sacks in canals and lead them to secure, happy homes where they are well cared for in handcrafted wicker baskets with lovely, snuggly faux-sheepskin blankets for them to purr on and little saucers of organic Jersey cream designed by Cath Kidston.

• Treble the beauty of the landscape.

• Engender social justice.

• Bring about lasting world peace.

• Mean that if you’re an ordinary, struggling working class landowner like Earl Spencer, the Duke of Gloucester, Lord Gisborough, the Earl of Moray or the Duke of Roxburghe – not forgetting our old friend Sir Reginald Sheffield Bt – you won’t after all be forced to sell your third-favourite Raphael cartoon in order to make ends meet, you just stick up a ruddy great wind farm instead and Bob’s your uncle: problem solved!

But wait. Before we rush to beautify even more of our countryside with these miraculous, bat-chomping eco-crucifixes, perhaps we ought to have a quick glance at the bona fides of the people responsible for this report.

Guido already has.

He notes that two out of the report’s three authors are senior employees of a wind company called GL Garrad Hassan. (And the third is an environmental activist – or “green tech cheerleader” as he trendsomely bills himself on Twitter).

As Upton Sinclair once said: “It is difficult to get a man to understand something when his job depends on not understanding it.”

One thought on “’Wind farms cure cancer, save kittens, create world peace’ says new wind industry report”

  1. Cordelia Farrow says:1st September 2012 at 10:13 pmI go to a country school, and most of the kids there are fighting wind farms alongside GCSEs! We’re an island; the sea has always been our biggest asset! Use tidal turbines, wind turbines don’t work! I’ve been fighting these for the last five years! I know kids in our village that can’t remember before we were fighting the wind farms. It’s all so wrong! Thank you, James Delingpole, for finally bringing some sanity to it all.

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Saved: and all thanks to wind farms!

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