59 per cent of UK population Are ‘Village Idiots’ Thunders The Times

Less than half the British population still believes in Anthropogenic Global Warming, says a new survey commissioned by The Times.

Only 41 per cent accept as an established scientific fact that global warming is taking place and is largely man-made. Almost a third (32 per cent) believe that the link is not yet proved; 8 per cent say that it is environmentalist propaganda to blame man and 15 per cent say that the world is not warming.

Even more interesting than the result, though, is the Thunderer’s appalled reaction. In a leader that might have been easily have been written by the Great Moonbat himself, the Times quite simply refuses to accept that the growing band of sceptics may have a point. Instead, it accuses these ‘deniers’ of being idiots:

It is possible that the collective expertise of brilliant scientists could be wrong. The best minds in the world once held a geocentric theory of the solar system. Before the discovery of sub-atomic particles they believed that everything was made of earth, air, fire and water. Right up to the 19th century, serious scientists wrote recipe books for making animals. But no previous process of scientific trial, error and progress has ever overturned such a well-attested thesis. Lord Rees has reminded us that we now live in a global village and it is, he pointed out, probably inevitable that there will be some global village idiots.

The Times’s approach is not unlike that of a Marxist theorist berating the bourgeoisie for their “false consciousness”; or indeed, a Eurocrat deciding that when sovereign nations keep voting “No” in Euro referendums it doesn’t mean that the EU is an oppressive and unpopular construct but that the voters need working on a bit harder so that they come to the correct “Yes” conclusion next time. It is, in fact, another perfect case of what Jonah Goldberg calls Liberal Fascism.

It is also an example of just how increasingly out-of-touch the MSM is with the views of the wider reading world. Recently, the Times launched a poster campaign boasting that it offered more extensive eco coverage than any other newspaper. Some of the claims made on these posters – such as the one about the North East passage being used as a commercial shipping route for the first time (when actually it has been used since 1934) – have been shot down by the excellent Andrew Orlowski on The Register.

But even if these claims were true, are wall-to-wall horror stories about impending man-made eco-doom really what readers of the quality newspapers want to read these days? My suspicion is not. I’m presuming that the audience which reads and comments on blogs isn’t totally different from the one that reads newspapers in print form. And if that’s the case, then the MSM’s obsession with AGW is looking increasingly out of date.

If you don’t believe me, check out the comments below one of George Monbiot’s columns, or indeed, either of the two Times articles listed above. Commenters who take the Al-Gore-approved line are vastly outnumbered by commenters who believe the whole AGW thing is a load of crock.

And it will take a bit more than bullying accusations that they’re “idiots”, I suspect, to swing them round.

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2 Responses to “59 per cent of UK population are ‘village idiots’ thunders The Times”

  1. Lauren says:November 17, 2009 at 2:46 amHey James,Loved your newest post about the whole Global Warming issue there in the UK.I found your site, because I clicked on one of your articles about Obama and the whole Nobel Peace prize issue, and I was like “this is so awesome”. It had humor in it, but it was the truth, too, and I instantly became a fan.I’ll definitely be subscribing.

    I’ll be checking out your books as well. Hopefully I can eventually purchase them online if they’re not in a book store here.

    Please keep on writing.

    I’ll keep reading.

    All the best,

    Lauren

  2. Sebaneau says:February 5, 2010 at 2:50 amAnd four days later, the Climategate files were released on the Internet…

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Is Edward McMillan-Scott the Most Tedious, Annoying and Ghastly Member in the Entire Euro Parliament?

Obviously, he faces some pretty stiff competition. But I surely can’t be the only one being driven to distraction by this potato-faced turncoat’s nuts-achingly tedious appearances every other day in the Guardian or on the BBC, reminding us yet again in relentless boring detail what a man of high principle he is for having been booted out of David Cameron’s Conservatives.

Really? I’d say, au contraire, that the expulsion of McMillan-Scott from the Tory party represents possibly Cameron’s finest hour so far. Of course the creep had to go. He was the man who did most to promulgate the canard that the Tories’ European ally Michal Kaminski was an anti-Semite – a charge Ed Miliband and the left-liberal media naturally seized on with alacrity. Pity Poland’s chief Rabbi (who happens to be Jewish) had to go and ruin the story by rising to Kaminski’s defence.

There’s nothing New Labour, the BBC and the Guardian like quite so much as a Tory (or ex-Tory, they’re not picky) attacking his party from the Europhile left. Just look at the reverence with which the likes of Chris Patten, Michael Heseltine and Kenneth Clarke are treated whenever they appear on the Today programmes: in one bound, they are transformed from decreasingly relevant has-beens from the outer regions of the Tory party’s total-sell-out, bien-pensant Whig fringe into still-vitally-important and ineffably-wise grandees, guardians of the holy secret of true and righteous conservatism.

Put it this way: before this concocted anti-Semitism Euro row broke out, had you ever even heard of Edward McMillan-Scott? Me neither.

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As Dirty Harry was in the Seventies, so Harry Brown is today: the movie warning of just how irredeemably stuffed we are | James Delingpole

November 10th, 2009

“I know what you’re thinkin’, punk. You’re thinkin’ did he fire six shots or only five? Now to tell you the truth, I’ve forgotten myself in all this excitement. But bein’ this is a .44 Magnum, the most powerful handgun in the world, and it’ll blow your head clean off, you’ve got to ask yourself a question. Do I feel lucky? Well, do ya, punk?!”

There’s a reason why those lines from Dirty Harry are some of the most popular and oft-quoted in cinematic history: because we most of us understand that sometimes a .44 Magnum bullet in the middle of the forehead is the only language the bad guys really understand.

How often and how vehemently we understand this depends on the times. In periods of relative abundance and security (even illusory ones, as in the case of the Blair era) we tend generally to take a more accommodating view of criminality, tinged with guilt that maybe we deserve it as a punishment for being too affluent. In times such as now, however, we quickly lose patience with such pussy liberal, we-are-all-to-blame, criminals-are-just-society’s-victims nonsense. We want retribution, harsh, immediate and preferably brain-spattered. We want someone like Dirty Harry or the Charles Bronson character in Michael Winner’s magisterial Death Wish oeuvre. Or Harry Brown.

At least I hope we want someone like Harry Brown. Not having seen the new Michael Caine movie yet I can’t be totally sure. Perhaps – like Clint Eastwood in Gran Torino, he wusses out at the last minute – but the plot, as related by Matt D’Ancona does sound jolly promising:

The film, compellingly directed by Daniel Barber, is the story of an elderly ex-Marine and widower living on a bleak south London estate whose best friend is slaughtered by drug-soaked hoodies.

Dismayed by the response of the police, Caine’s Harry seeks his own bloody form of justice, embarking on a journey into the hellish world of teenage crime that is both shockingly violent and morally unsparing.

I wish, though, I could share D’Ancona’s optimism that all these horrors are going to be averted thanks to the simultaneously tough and compassionate measures being planned by David Cameron as part of his Iain-Duncan-Smith influenced mending “Broken Britain” policy.

Those who say Cameron is a risk-averse pragmatist should read what he has actually said on the subject of social breakdown: for he has repeatedly pledged nothing less than the systematic repair of the Broken Society, a series of reforms ranging from tougher welfare policies, a transformed education system, a presumption that all convicted of a knife crime will go to jail, support for those who marry, and a range of measures to deal with addiction.

Long term, I would agree that some of this sounds promising. But in the immediate future – the next five years say – only one thing is going to make any significant difference to the levels of violent crime in Britain and that is stiffer prison sentencing. Our coffers are empty. Every government department (apart from Health, obviously) can expect to have its budgets slashed by a good ten or fifteen per cent. Can even the most fervent optimist among Cameron’s Kool-Aid drinkers persuade me that he will find the money needed for the necessary prison-building programme and related staffing costs?

Time, I think, for us all to follow the two Harrys and reach for our .44 Magnums or our old service revolvers. (Except we can’t, of course, thanks to the government’s post-Dunblane only-criminals-shall-be-allowed-to-possess-handguns legislation)

Time, then, to emigrate. But where?

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One Response to “As Dirty Harry was in the Seventies, so Harry Brown is today: the movie warning of just how irredeemably stuffed we are”

  1. Paul Hogan says:November 11, 2009 at 9:52 amChina. I have lived here for eight years now. A great sense of freedom, (except for some internet access) and a safe place to live.

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Hmm. Can’t Imagine What Major Malik Nadal Hasan’s Motivation Could Have Been

Nor it seems can the liberal mainstream media.

I was watching BBC’s Newsnight when the story broke of a killing spree at a Texas military base and instantly wondered – as I’m sure did 99.99 per cent of its other viewers – whether this had anything to do with the Religion of Peace. Then a news update came in that the suspect’s name was ‘Hasan’. But the BBC’s reporter hastened to reassure us that there was “no evidence” to suggest this was an act of “terrorism”. Phew! Perish the unworthy thought.

Even today, the MSM is treading on eggshells regarding the killer’s possible motivation.

Here’s the Independent:

A motive for the shooting was hard to pin down last night. However, there were reports that Hasan, who was trained also in psychiatry and medicine in Bethesda, Maryland, was preparing for deployment to Iraq and was not happy to be going there. He had previously worked at the Walter Reed veterans hospital outside Washington.

Yeah, that would be it. You don’t want to be deployed to a combat zone so you do what any sane officer does under the circumstances. Not resign your commission obviously, but tool yourself up and take out a dozen a so of your unarmed comrades.

The BBC’s website takes a similar line, though it does at least (presumably in breach of all BBC guidelines) cheekily slip in the “M” word:

It is not clear what motivated the attacker, named as 39-year-old military psychiatrist Major Nidal Malik Hasan.

But some reports said the US-born Muslim was unhappy about being sent to Iraq or Afghanistan.

Interesting use of that word “unhappy”, mind.

The Guardian meanwhile, has a brave stab at the ‘trauma-crazed war vet goes tonto’ line, with the help of one of Hasan’s relatives:

One of Hasan’s cousins, Nader Hasan, told reporters the major was dreading going to war, having counselled scores of returning soldiers with post-traumatic stress disorder.

Next to the story, it provides a link to the story of another US veteran – Sergeant John Russell – who did just that, killing 5 of his comrades in May. Unfortunately, as it is forced to admit in a more detailed analysis, can’t have been traumatised by combat because, er….

He was not a soldier returning from deployment in either Iraq or Afghanistan, suffering from stress or combat fatigue. Hasan, although 39 years old, has never served in a war zone.

But that doesn’t stop the Guardian speculating desperately:

Instead, his horror of war came secondhand. He was a psychiatrist who listened to the harrowing stories of his comrades at the Walter Reed Hospital in Washington DC, and latterly at Fort Hood, Texas.

Ah yes that will be it. A bit like passive smoking, the Major was suffering from passive combat stress.

My favourite example of liberal squeamishness, though, comes from the New York Times. Sure towards the bottom of its report, it manages to slip in such not-altogether-irrelevant details as Hasan’s former imam’s claim that he was “very serious about his religion” (so much so that he hadn’t been able to find a sufficiently fundamentalist wife) and that a man with the same name as him was under investigation from the FBI for putting up enthusiastic postings on a Jihadist website about the joys of suicide bombing.

But not before having first blamed those far more likely causes – white racism…

But Maj. Nidal Malik Hasan, the 39-year-old man accused of Thursday’s mass shooting at Fort Hood, Tex., began having second thoughts about a military career a few years ago after other soldiers harassed him for being a Muslim, he told relatives in Virginia.

And, yes, of course, that old favourite – passive combat stress:

Having counseled scores of returning soldiers with post-traumatic stress disorder, first at Walter Reed Army Medical Center in Washington and more recently at Fort Hood, he knew all too well the terrifying realities of war, said a cousin, Nader Hasan. “He was mortified by the idea of having to deploy,” Mr. Hasan said. “He had people telling him on a daily basis the horrors they saw over there.”

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In the Name of JUSTICE We MUST Send Mark Thatcher to Equatorial Guinea

If we didn’t, it would be a terrible opportunity missed, don’t you think?

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The Spectator’s Editor Agrees: The Only Way out of This Ghastly Euro Fudge Is OUT

I never tire of reading Fraser Nelson’s political analysis. Not because he’s my new editor at the Spectator and I feel I ought to suck up to him but because, like me, he’s right about everything. But he’s right about everything in a much clever and more insightful way than I am. Mostly I tend to wing it, whereas Fraser totally knows his stuff.

What he has to say in Spectator Coffee House about the Conservatives’ new non-policy on Europe is an essential read.

He starts off quite kindly towards Cameron. Nelson understands as well as anyone that Cameron WILL be our next prime minister and that, a bit like parents and schoolteachers are supposed to do with children, you can’t forever be telling him how rubbish he’s going to be. If you’re going to criticise, first you must say something nice. So Nelson does:

He is right not to promise what he calls a “made-up referendum”, that would accomplish nothing other then vent rage.

Semi-compliment over and done with, Nelson sticks in the knife. Cameron’s promise to renegotiate powers from Brussels is a nonsense, he explains.

What the new Tory package amounts to is a promise to ask the EU very nicely if it will consider handing back a few powers over employment and justice. The answer will be ‘no’. Saying that he might hold a referendum over a wider package of guarantees will carry no weight. By ignoring the Dutch and French ‘no’ votes the EU has shown that it cares not a jot what the little people think. It is a project of the elites, for the elites.

Given that the EU is guaranteed to crush all the Conservatives’ pathetically feeble attempts to claw back tiny bits and bobs of British sovereignty, what is the answer? There is, says Nelson, only one thing that will frighten the EU bullies – a referendum on whether Britain should remain in the EU at all.

The ‘in or out’ question is seen as an extreme position in Westminster, which shows just how out of touch our political class has become. Brussels’s own polling shows that less than a third of the British public consider our membership of the EU to be ‘a good thing’ — and this was last year when our net contribution to the EU was just £3.1 billion. Next year it will be £7.8 billion (due to the budget deal the would-be President Blair negotiated) and serious questions will be asked as to whether all these regulations are worth the money we pay for them. Recent EU research shows that just 37% think the benefits of EU membership outweigh the costs.

Perhaps some Kool-Aid drinkers out there will be able to tell me what wonderful benefits Britain will get from the EU mafia in return for that £7.8 billion protection money. Perhaps they’ll also be able to explain why, no really, Cameron’s policy announcement on Europe yesterday is as tough as tough can be and will eventually result in all sorts of powers being returned to Britain. The absolute right to decide on the size of the white margins on our postage stamps, maybe. Or the right of parents to chastise their kids lightly on the hand if they have stolen a car. Or the right of employers to sack any staff member found with his hand in till on more than 22 occasions.

Certainly I’m quite sure that whatever Cameron is planning, it will be – as Dan would no doubt say – the terrors of the earth.

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Enough Eloquent Eexcuses, Dave: Tthe Only Place for a Conservative Britain in Europe Is Out

Today David Cameron is going to explain plausibly, reasonably and, for all I know, convincingly just why it is that he has no option other than to welsh on his promise to hold a referendum on the Lisbon Treaty. And lots of clever commentators will pile in, as the imminent Lord Finkelstein has already with his characteristic wit, charm and insight, to confirm that, no really, Dave Cameron is as rabidly Eurosceptical as any of us, but that he is also a pragmatist; and that what you have to understand is blah, blah, blahdiblah di blah.

And do you know what? I do not ****ing care. And I’m guessing that an awful lot of you reading this – those that aren’t still drinking the Cameroon Kool-Aid and repeating your consoling mantra about how “look, the important thing is to get Brown out, anything else is just icing on the cake…” – feel exactly the same way.

Is this a childish response? Quite possibly. But what it is, more importantly, is an honest and visceral response. This is the glory of the blogosphere. You don’t have to dress up your argument in supersubtle nuance. You can just cut to the chase and tell it like it is: the European Constitution has stolen British sovereignty; it will make us poorer, more highly regulated, less democratically accountable and less free. You cannot run an effective Conservative government within a Socialist Europe. You can’t. It is simply not possible.

Yeah, sure. If I sat down at a table right now with a bunch of lawyers, and wonks from Policy Exchange, and members of Cameron’s shadow cabinet, I’m quite sure that within the hour I would be won over. “Dear boy,” they’d persuade me in that wonderfully patronising mandarin way, “Of course we feel your pain and your rage. Everything you say is quite true. But in the real world….”

Ah yes, of course. That old saw about politics being the “art of the possible” – the weasel get-out of compromised politicians everywhere. Well I’m sorry, but that to me is not the language of realism. It’s the language of surrender and failure.

The reason I’m interested in politics is because I’m ideological. The reason I’m ideological is because I’m interested in what’s right and what’s wrong, what works and what doesn’t, what ultimately is going to make us all happier, richer and more free.

I still don’t see Cameron’s Pragmatic, Compassionate, but not that Conservative Conservatives offering us any of those things. (Obviously Blair/Brown’s mob didn’t either, but a) one never expected it of them and b) they’re really not worth writing about any more because they are toast). And their nuanced position on Europe – negotiating various opt-outs in certain key areas – is a case in point.

Not only is this mere tinkering at the margins (I notice for example, that they’re not even thinking about trying to extricate us from Europe’s crippling carbon regulations) but it’s most unlikely to work. As David Davis rightly (and rather bravely, given Cameron’s Stalinist line on dissent) argues in the Mail today, the EU “engrenage” machine is grindingly effective at crushing all attempts by constituent members who want to claw back tiny gobbets of sovereignty.

The Europeans are past masters at the permanent negotiation that makes up the federal project. They know all the tricks of isolation, pressure, delay, coalition, vague language, and institutional and judicial expansion.

Here’s the bottom line: until the day when, by whatever means, we can renegotiate our position in Europe so that it is little more than a friendly trading bloc, Britain is screwed.

If Cameron doesn’t understand this – and act upon it – then let us pray he’s replaced sooner rather than later by a leader who does.

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10 Reasons Why It Won’t Be So Bad When The Tories Get In | James Delingpole

November 4th, 2009

 

Yes I know, I know. I’m clutching at straws here. The incoming Tory administration will be so disappointing that some of us – me, for example – are already christening it The Great Disappointment (TM).

Cameron’s sell-out on Europe was, of course, the final nail in the coffin. As I’m sure I must have said before – not that you don’t know anyway – a Tory government within a Socialist superstate is a contradiction in terms. Until some Conservative firebrand has the balls to acknowledge this and, more to the point, take over the party leadership, I see no real future for Britain other than a Heathite managed decline.

But there’s so much other nonsense we’re going to have to put up with too: Hundreds of overpromoted women (“Cameron’s Cuties” – eeek! Run away! Run away!) proving themselves every bit as not-up-to-the-job (or indeed the flattering nickname) as Blair’s Babes. An instinctively left-liberal Justice Minister failing to reform the Human Rights Act because he secretly quite sympathises with it (see Joshua Rozenberg in Standpoint). No sense whatsoever on “Climate Change”, nor any semblance of a non-lunatic Energy Policy. Etc.

Don’t worry, though, it’s not all bad. There’s Michael Gove’s education reforms. And, er….

Er.

Um.

No just teasing. Having racked my brain really hard I’ve now managed to find ten more brilliant reasons why it won’t be so bad if the Tories win the next election.

1.  The Head of the Charity Commission will be out of a job.

2. “Dame” “Suzi” “Leather” will be fired.

3. No more will the taxpayer be shovelling £80,000 a year (for a three day week) into the bulging handbag of “Dame” “Suzi” “Leather”

4. “Dame” “Suzi” “Leather” will no longer be mockingly known as the “Quango Queen” because she won’t be Queen of any Quango.

5. St Mary’s Calne educated “Dame” “Suzi” “Leather” will no longer be able to vent her class-war, Socialist spleen on innocent private schools.

6. “Dame” “Suzi” “Leather” will have £80,000 a year less to spend privately educating her kids.

7. “Dame” “Suzi” “Leather” will have to throw away all her business cards saying “Dame Suzi Leather; Head; Charity Commission.”

8. “Dame” “Suzi” “Leather” will no longer be able to claim perks (travel to London from Exeter, accommodation, etc) which amounted last year to £25,403, just three thousand a year less than it costs annually to put a gel through her alma mater, St Mary’s Calne.

9. Within a few months everyone will have forgotten who “Dame” “Suzi” “Leather” is because she will no longer be in a position to be incredibly annoying and make people’s lives misery.

10. Er. Sorry. I can’t think of any more reasons to vote Conservative. Unless, perhaps, they promise also to disband the Independent Safeguarding Authority and send its chairman Sir Roger Singleton down the salt mines, chained to a work party which also includes Ed Balls, George Monbiot, the Hon Sir Jonathan “Badger Bum” Porritt, and of course the former “Dame” “Suzi” “Leather”. Mind you if they did promise it I’ll bet you anything you like it would never happen. They’re quite slippery that way, Cameron’s Tories.

2 Responses to “10 Reasons Why It Won’t Be So Bad When The Tories Get In”

  1. Annie Walker says:November 4, 2009 at 10:41 amVery funny. I thought that you had stopped sending me articles because I said I’d just cancelled all newspapers, well, apart from The Spectator, The Week, New York Review of Books, London ditto Weekend FT, Sunday Times – do we need all these? If there is anything interesting going on I am sure Mr. Delingpole will tell me, and amusingly and full of insight with it.
  2. Galatian says:November 5, 2009 at 2:24 pmCan I send you my laundry bill if you make me p*ss myself?

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I’m So Addicted to Email, Facebook and Twitter, I Have to Hide It from My Wife

BEddie Mulholland Email I?m so addicted to email, I have to hide it from my wife Only connected: while writing this article, James Delingpole looked at 51 emails, joined a Facebook debate and checked his Twitter pages Photo: Eddie Mulholland

A friend of mine was driving his family back from their half-term hols in Cornwall and the journey was taking far longer than it should. Two hours in and Tom’s fingers were starting to twitch. After four hours, he’d had enough.

“What are you doing?” said his wife Kate.

“Er just, you know, um checking my emails,” said Tom.

“But we’re on the motorway, we’ve got two kids sleeping in the back and YOU’RE DRIVING!” Kate screamed.

When Kate told me this story over dinner the other day, I think she expected me to be horrified. But I’m afraid my sympathies were all with Tom. Sure, it’s not the safest thing in the world to be fumbling with a BlackBerry while simultaneously trying to steer your family down a motorway at 70 miles an hour. But when the voice in your head is saying “Must check those emails. Muuussst check those emails,” what is a guy supposed to do? Ignore it?

What Tom and I are apparently suffering from is the tyranny of email – which also happens to be the title of a despairing new book by John Freeman. Freeman, the editor of Granta magazine, decided enough was enough when he popped out with a friend for some coffee and came back 45 minutes later to find 72 new messages “marching down the screen like some sort of advancing army”.

According to Freeman, the communications technology designed to bring us together is driving us apart. Where once we used to interact with real people, we now content ourselves with shallow cyber-friendships on Twitter and Facebook, replacing meaningful conversation with terse 140-character messages and glib one-liners calculated to shock, amuse or annoy.

(to read more, click here)

Non-recoverable link.

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Official: UK Law Now Says ManBearPig-Worship Is a Religion to Rank Alongside Christianity, Judaism, Islam, etc.

Oh dear, it’s official (nearly): a belief in man-made climate change grants you the same anti-discrimination protection in the British work-place you’d get if, say, you were a Muslim and your employer forced you to eat pork, or you were a Christian and your boss insisted you sacrifice a big black cock at the stroke of midnight on the Winter Solstice in the middle of a ruddy great pentacle, or you were a Rastafarian, and your boss wouldn’t allow you to pop outside for your statutory religious reefer-break.

At least that’s the maddening situation that one Tim Nicholson, 42, of Oxford is striving to engineer with the help of our crazed, activist-lawyer-riddled legal system.

Nicholson has been given the go-ahead, on appeal, to sue his former employer Grainger plc for unfair dismissal under  the Employment Equality (Religion and Belief) Regulations 2003 which cover “any religion, religious belief, or philosophical belief”.

Nicholson, formerly Grainger plc’s head of sustainability, said he had tried to set up a “carbon management system” for the company. Yet for some mysterious reason we can only guess at, Nicholson says staff refused to give him the necessary information which would have enabled him to calculate the company’s carbon footprint. Grainger claims it got rid of Nicholson for “operational” and “structural” reasons. Nicholson, however, believes it was a form of discrimination against his sincere, deep, heartfelt and passionate views on AGW.

His solicitor, Shah Qureshi, said: “Essentially what the judgment says is that a belief in man-made climate change and the alleged resulting moral imperative is capable of being a philosophical belief and is therefore protected by the 2003 religion or belief regulations.”

I do hope he wins, for it will only serve to bolster the suit I’m currently planning to launch against my own employer UK plc. Under this new belief system I have invented – Delingpolism (currently with only one known adherent – but the rest of you are more than welcome to join) – anyone who proselytises on behalf of AGW, carbon capture, Cap & Trade or wind farms without being able to demonstrate with at least 95 per cent certainty that their cause has any scientific foundation whatsoever, must be exiled immediately to the Arctic Circle, there to dwell among the still surprisingly large population of ravening polar bears until such time as they are gobbled up, digested and excreted into the Arctic oceans ready to pass through the food chain and end up in the beauteous gullets of the mighty blue whale (or similar).

So far, my religion’s precepts have been completely ignored by my employer. I feel sorely discriminated against. Got to be worth a couple of million in damages, at least, wouldn’t you agree?

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