Damp Squib Irma Spares Mar-a-Lago; Wreaks Havoc on Climate Chicken Littles

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Irma is now officially the most disastrous hurricane in the history of the world…
…But only if you’re a radical Muslim or a climate alarmist or you work in the construction industry.

For the last week, all the usual suspects from green hedgefunder Tom “rhymes with liar” Steyer to anti-capitalist disaster harpie Naomi Klein – plus their de facto allies in Islamic State – have been wetting their knickers with excitement at the prospect of a biblical inundation to rival Noah’s flood.

Instead the worst possible thing happened.

Not only did Irma fail to destroy nearly as many Trump-voting Floridian homes and businesses as they had hoped; but it left the mother of all targets – Mar-a-Lago – without virtually a scratch.

Read the rest at Breitbart.

Hurricane Patricia Was a Damp Squib

Conchita Alvarez, 47: “My burrito was ruined. A sudden gust blew sand in it and made it all gritty.”

Jesus Sanchez, 74: “Never mind your burrito, I lost my sombrero – a treasured heirloom from the days when all we Mexicans wore sombreros, before we learned from enlightened Gringos that they are demeaning and stereotypical and racist and fit only for Jeremy Clarkson jokes.”

Santiago Garcia, 28: “Every one of my tomato pots was blown over. My salsa will never taste the same.”

But, amid all the suffering that this truly terrifying non-event of a damp squib has caused since it made landfall in Mexico, let us reserve our most special prayers for the people it hit hardest of all, viz: all those climate alarmists who, before it struck, were confidently assuring us that this was going to be the hurricane to end all hurricanes; and one which, furthermore, would offer a brutal rebuttal to all those foolish enough to deny the reality of climate change.

Among them, were Wired’s Nick Stockton, who breathlessly set the scene with this portentous opening paragraph:

Read the rest at Breitbart.